Important announcement for 2006
December 30th, 2005 by Ray Tice Comment: Post Your Comments!
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*****OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE*****
Ray Tice makes important announcement concerning 2006
This morning at approximately 7:43 a.m. Ray Tice made the official announcement that the upcoming year is to be known as “the Year of Ray”. Tice, sitting in a bathrobe eating a bowl of generic brand Maple and Brown Sugar oatmeal, made the announcement from his press conference/living room inside his Columbus, Indiana apartment.
“I want everything to be about Ray this year,” Tice announced to no one in particular. “Everything that someone says or does this year should have something to do with Ray Tice, especially the ‘doing’ part. The entire year should evolve around the idea of me and celebrate my ultimate coolness.”
Reached for comment later in the day, Tice stated, “Leave me alone, I’m trying to find a place in the hallway to pee.”
Tice’s announcement was met with celebration worldwide. A spokesperson for the country of America said, “This really comes as no surprise to me. We were already planning on doing this anyway because I mean have you seem him lately? Yowza!” Some day cares and Laundromats closed early for the day so that people could reflect on Ray’s total complete awesomeness and to make plans on how to celebrate the year of Ray.
Experts predict that Tice’s announcement and proclamation that 2006 be officially named, “The Year of Ray” will be met with much more acceptance and admiration that 2005’s namesake, Billy Underwood.
“Billy Underwood named 2005 ‘The Year of Billy’ and it went over like a brick, stated scientist David Campbell. “No one celebrated the year mainly because no one knew who he was in the first place and also because he didn’t finally make the announcement until mid-April and it was just considered too much of a faux-pas that it was met with great resentment.”
Tice plans on spending the first day of ‘The Year of Ray’ quietly at home catching up on his “People” magazine subscription.
-End of Press Release-
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